Key Takeaways
Fight False Allegations in Child Custody
By Julie Colin, Esq.
As a family law attorney with over 30 years of courtroom experience, I’ve seen almost everything. But few things are more devastating, or more dangerous, than when a parent is falsely accused during a custody battle. In high-conflict disputes, the legal system can be weaponized, and unfortunately, I’ve seen firsthand how allegations, especially those involving abuse, can be used as leverage rather than for protection.
A Real Case, A Real Crisis
In one recent case, a mother accused my client (the father) of sexually assaulting their 4-year-old child. The father was terrified. He was also completely innocent, and we had documented proof to support it. But the accusation alone changed everything. He was suddenly fighting not just for time with his child, but for his reputation, his freedom, and his future.
“I’ve seen this playbook before,” I told him. “And I know how to protect you.”
These situations are emotionally and legally complex. But there are clear steps you can take if you ever find yourself in this position.
Step 1: Don’t Panic, Get Counsel
False accusations can trigger fear, anger, and a desire to fight back. But your first move should be finding experienced legal counsel who knows family law and how custody accusations play out in court.
“You’re shocked, but you need to protect yourself immediately,” I often tell clients. “Let me guide you through this.”
Step 2: Document Everything
Save every message, email, screenshot, and note. If your accuser is communicating inconsistently or threatening you with legal action, that could become valuable evidence. We can use this to show a pattern of manipulation or contradiction.
Step 3: Understand the Motivation
Sometimes false allegations arise out of fear, resentment, or even desperation. A parent might feel they’re losing control, or be advised by someone to make an extreme move. That doesn’t make it okay, but understanding the why can help us build a strategic response.
In my client’s case, the other parent was receiving free legal services and seemed to be using the legal system as a sword, not a shield. These dynamics matter.
Step 4: Protect Your Child
If you’re being accused, it’s natural to want to clear your name. But don’t lose sight of your child’s experience. Courts care most about the child’s safety, emotional well-being, and continuity. I advise clients:
“Even while defending yourself, you must continue showing up as a stable, loving parent. That’s what courts remember.”
Step 5: Be Prepared for the Long Haul
Family court doesn’t always move quickly, especially when serious allegations are made. But the truth has staying power. We will respond to each filing, subpoena what’s needed, and present a calm, fact-based defense.
A Final Word of Support
“False allegations are one of the most painful things a parent can go through, but you don’t have to face them alone. I will fight for you. I will protect your rights. And most importantly, I will make sure your child’s future is not defined by someone else’s false claims.”
If you’re navigating a custody case where accusations have been made against you, reach out. The earlier you get help, the stronger your position will be.
Julie Colin, Esq., is a Maryland and New Jersey family law attorney with extensive experience in high-conflict custody disputes, false allegation defense, and advocacy for parental rights. She is known for her trial skill, her calming presence, and her deep understanding of what families—and children—need to move forward.
