When a marriage does not work out and couples decide it is better to part ways than to endure the agony of staying in an unhappy, unhealthy situation, divorce is the solution. The decision to get a divorce does not come easy. It comes with a lot of uncertainty and emotions that can be overwhelming. Once you finally choose to get a divorce, it is important to know the steps you need to take in order to receive a fair outcome. So, where do you begin?
Consult a Chicago divorce attorney
In any type of divorce, no matter how amicable it may be, you should consult a divorce attorney first. To be aware of your rights, the options you have, and how the law will apply to your case, it is very important that you talk to an attorney. Also, it is common to hear all sorts of divorce stories. However, because no two divorces are alike, you cannot expect that your divorce will be the same as other people’s cases. At Petrelli Previtera, we know that your case is unique and we will work with you to craft a strategy that best fits your needs.
Communicate with your children
If you have children and are going through a divorce, their well-being after the split should be your top priority. It is common parental instinct to protect your children from the difficult reality of divorce because they might be too young to understand. Nevertheless, even if you feel anxious or uncertain as to how your children will react and cope, you need to reach out and communicate to them. Consider their feelings and make sure they understand that they are not at fault for the divorce. Also, do not alienate them from the other parent, badmouth your ex, or manipulate them to be on your side. Always remember that it is your responsibility as a parent to put your children’s best interests first when deciding custody and support during the divorce.
Communicate With Your Spouse That You Want a Divorce
Telling your spouse that you want a divorce is never easy. It can be a difficult and emotionally draining conversation. However, it is important to be honest and direct when communicating your wishes. Here are a few tips that can help you have a successful conversation with your spouse about divorce:
1. Be Prepared for Their Reaction: It is important to prepare yourself for your spouse’s reaction to your news. They may be shocked and hurt, and it is important to be understanding and respectful of their feelings.
2. Make Time to Talk: Don’t just spring the news on your spouse. Set aside a time when you can both have a peaceful, uninterrupted conversation.
3. Be Honest: Be honest about why you want a divorce. Explain your reasons clearly and calmly.
4. Listen: Listen to your spouse’s reaction without feeling the need to respond immediately.
5. Have an Open Mind: Be open to the possibility that your spouse may have different opinions and feelings on the matter.
6. Be Respectful: Even if you are hurt or angry, it is important to remain respectful when communicating with your spouse.
Gather and organize relevant documents
Consult your attorney about which specific type of documents will be relevant in the process of divorce, such as the following:
- Bank statements
- Credit reports
- Tax information
- Prenuptial agreements, if any
- Household expenditures
- Debt information
- Medical records
- Children’s school records
- Criminal files or records of your spouse like restraining orders, if any
Choose your battles
You must be clear on which issues are open for negotiations and which are not. A Chicago divorce attorney will help you understand what issues you have rights to and are worth fighting for and which areas could be helped with communication and compromise. Being clear on these issues will protect you from being taken advantage of and dealing with an unfair settlement agreement. Focus on the long-term goals you have in mind and the kind of life you envision for yourself after the divorce. Consider what is best in the long run for your children, whether or not it is sole or joint custody and whether or not to keep the house or to settle with monetary payment. You have tough decisions to make, so make sure you use your better judgement with the help of a trustworthy attorney to get to these important issues.
There’s no way around it, divorce is tough. However, with the help of an experienced divorce attorney, you don’t have to go through it alone. We have helped countless people facing marital crises take their life from chaos to clarity. Schedule your consultation today so we can help you too.